Bardic Words of Art

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"She's Fer E'eryt'ingin'", by Duryl

Now... a... fair so I says she's fer e'eryt'ingin'..Fer big crowds adinnin' at Bob's openingin'...Fer 'uge wheels aspinnin', giddy eveningin'...An' apply lips grinnin' while yer 'air ye's wringin'...

Oh yer t'irs' an' yer 'unger t' fair she'll appease,Fer t'ere's ale t'ere an' cider an' 'ot an' colt teas,Slushies, fluffy can'y, sal'y taffee t' please,Inside out corn an' drinks made from lemons ye squeeze.

Aye... t'at... fair as ye's 'eard she's fer e'eryt'ingin',Fer sum couply twinnin' or wee kiddie bringin',Fer alls is akinnin', 'aggy 'ouse aclingin'.An' blue ribbon pinnin' when fat caddle kingin'.

Oh t'ere's piggies an' ponies an' bunnies t' pet.T'ere's golt marks, ticket stubbies, an' stuffed toys t' bet,An' sum prize fer big snackers what don' get upset,But t'em creepers an' crawlers ye'd likely regret.

T'at... fine... fair ain' ye 'eard she's fer e'eryt'ingin',Fer t'at darlin' Maudie who deals anythingin',Fer queues what ain' t'innin', yet folks is still singin'.While fellers try winnin' from shellers what's stringin'.

Oh t'ere's kewpies, lobster, an' ain' quite yet bacon,Lizards an' chippymunks an' dangly kraken,Fer neckies an' trunkies and birds lads is achin'.An' sum shiny dragon's still t'ere t' be taken.

But... t'at... fair we all know she's fer e'eryt'ingin',Fer big 'ammer swingin' seddin' bells a dingin',Fer liddle knee skinnin' while 'igh bouncy springin'...An' sum 'orsey clingin' atween apple flingin'.

Oh t'ere's golt t' be won, aye, wit' t'ree funny diesAn' a ladder when climbt what'll earn ye a prize.An' sum big branchy tree what t' careless despiseLike t'at fearsome lass wit' irresis'able eyes.

But... now... she's o'er ain' no more e'eryt'ingin'...No big crowds adinnin', no more openingin'...No wheels aspinnin', no giddy eveningin'...Until nex' beginnin', jus' memories o' singin'...A Reply from Lathet

Said Aeruk to the dwarven bard,I don't think that you work hard.You must raise a hand and slayWork with weapons day by day

It's time for you to prove your worthTime for bards to accept the truthSinging, dancing, doing plays,Telling stories, they're not the way.

Unlike you, I do not fearTo carry weapons 'gainst the HoardeI'll use dagger, sling and spearMy spells back up my sword!

Replied she to the reni mageI'm still of use up on the stageFor all my actions there's a reasonHow dare you imply treason?

In our ranks, morale is fallingMore give up all the timeI say, enough with stallingIt's time to draw the line!

Weighed down by mistakes they can't abideSpirits swallowed by the shame,Pushed to the brink, they suicide.They fade, their souls by Void claimed.

Every week we see another oneThe times, they've gotten tough;How can you say it's not enough?